Many of you would have just begun college and are eager to continue learning. While this is an exciting time, it can also be unnerving, stressful, and overwhelming!
If you have mixed feelings about starting college, be assured – you are not alone. Almost everyone feels the contradictions of excitement and fear.
These twin emotions of eager excitement and fear/nervousness may mark almost everything important you do in college. Eagerness will propel you to try new things, while fear will hold you back.
Let us look at how these feelings play out in the three main goals of college life:
1) Academic success, aka Mastery of Subject
College life is undoubtedly about challenging syllabus and new ways of learning. Now, more than ever, you must study independently, make notes, gather information, and think through it.
As you start, you are eager and excited; this provides momentum to plough through the most challenging subjects. You may encounter some obstacles on the way, but a genuine interest and curiosity to learn more will keep you going.
On the other hand, if you find yourself thinking, ‘I am weak at this subject,’ or ‘I don’t like the teacher/course,’ or ‘Why do I feel like bunking this class?’ – this fear will hold you back from trying to find ways to understand the topics. Acknowledging these thought patterns can help deal with them.
A simple way is to check your thinking pattern around the various topics: Start asking questions – Are you getting bored/ finding topics difficult? Who are the great thinkers on this topic? What do they say? Reading books, searching the internet, and talking to seniors can help you find answers
2) Expanding your repertoire of skills and interests, aka Building a personality
College is about rediscovering old hobbies and interests or discovering new ones. Many students have found their calling through extra-curricular activities. At the very least, college extra-curricular can help develop some much-needed skills that can be useful in later life. Communication, teamwork, presentations, etc., are often part of club activities; you learn these easily. Most colleges have several clubs for these hobbies, like music, drama, and social service clubs.
We may observe two patterns among students – one extreme is those who join all clubs. They may do this in eagerness and for all the wrong reasons, such as wanting to be everywhere and making ‘cool’ friends. Here, curbing some of your excitement is helpful. Choose one or two clubs you most want to join and stick to improving and enjoying yourself there. How would you know which club to choose? Some clubs may offer trial periods, or find as much information as possible about the clubs to help you select. See if the activities can help you in your chosen field. E.g., if I want to work with children joining a social service club that includes school visits is a good plan.
The other extreme is where some of you do not join any club out of fear. Often you may feel socially awkward or shy because most clubs involve some degree of socializing. If you feel like this and want to join a club, initially attend events organized by the club without participating. Slowly seek out seniors or peers with whom you can attend the events, and you may find yourself slowly enjoying and becoming an active club member.
3) Forming your friend circle – aka – the art of Networking
College life has more to offer than just academics. Forming friendships is the most eagerly awaited part of college life. College friendships often translate into lifelong friendships.
In an eagerness to make friends and become a part of a circle you think is ‘happening,’ some of you may use tactics like clowning around, bending backward to accommodate friends, trying out cool lingo, or uncool habits. Even if these tactics seem to get you noticed and accepted, acknowledge that you have used them in your eagerness to be part of a group. Would you do that again, or will this become an oft-repeated pattern?
On the other hand, if you are shy and quiet, you may find yourself without friends and feel lonely. You may feel frightened to reach out to someone you like and, thus, find yourself stuck in a pattern of being ‘scared to try and envious of those who make friends quickly.’ Try simple ways of introducing yourself and meeting common ground. Meet college counselors for help if you feel tongue-tied or awkward in social situations.
In this blog, we have seen the important issues faced by college students, one important skill needed by every college student to help navigate college life is time management.
Look out for our next blog to understand more about time management as a skill and how to improve it!